Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Life Unbalanced

Let me start by saying that life is overwhelming for me.  It's hard to admit that when you want to have it all together, but that is the best way to describe it.  I know I am blessed in pretty much every way possible so I don't want to sound unappreciative in any way, but I'm a real person that lives with stress and anxiety.  I have struggles, and though they may seem insignificant to others, they are struggles for me.  In this new year, I am trying to overcome these struggles and figure out ways to relieve the stress and anxiety that I get from them.

I think that "BALANCE" is a key word in working on this.  When you have a million and one things to do, nothing is going to shorten your to do simply have to figure out a way to balance it all out.  So that is my priority right now. 

In general, I am a very organized person.  I am a planner.  I like To Do lists.  I like things to be tidy and clutter-free.  I like routine and schedules.   In fact, Scott has nick-named me "Eva" (one of my many nicknames - you should see the envelope of my Christmas card) of Wall-E.  Eva is a robot and that is exactly what he thinks I am.  I like routine and order and consistency.  I like directions and I follow them to a T. I guess I have a little bit of OCD, but since having children, things just get hectic.  Schedules have to be more flexible, and you have to realize that even though you just cleaned the entire house, it's not going to look like that in 30 minutes.  So the best way for me to handle this is to make a plan.

The problem is that I am an all or nothing kinda girl.  For example, I would be happy if I never had any laundry sitting in a basket.  I hate when my clothes are in piles and not put away, but guess what?  That's how they always are.  I NEVER put my laundry away because I never have time at that moment that they come out of the dryer to fold them, so the clothes begin to pile up, the pile overwhelms I leave it.  If I can't do something entirely, then I don't even want to begin the process.  I don't like to clean one room of my house...I want to clean the entire thing from top to bottom or I don't feel like it's worth my time.  So I have to figure out a schedule.  I need to fold one load of laundry everyday.  I need to set time limits for myself for doing certain things (the internet, TV).  There are many adjustments that I know I can make that will help me to feel more accomplished and less overwhelmed at the end of the week.  Working full time certainly makes it all more challenging.  I don't get to fold laundry, or get on the computer, or clean the house, or exercise while the girls nap.  I have to manage doing all of those things in the little bit of time that I have with my children without taking time away from them. 

I know you're probably thinking, "so why are you sitting here typing a blog when you could be tackling your to do list?"  but as strange as it may seem, opening up and being honest about my life to others and especially to other moms that can relate is a stress reliever to me.  It's early in the morning and my girls are still sleeping, so I try to stay quiet while they sleep anyways. 

I won't type out my entire oh so very detailed schedule, but here are a few of my goals...
  • Set aside time for a daily devotional reading - Spend more time with God
  • Exercise at least 3x a week
  • Fold 1 load of laundry at least every other day
  • Have Keira help clean up her toys after bathtime...every night!
  • Spend less time in the morning on the computer to allow for straightening up, unloading/reloading dishwasher, washing bottles/pump avoid running late like usual
  • Set out girl's outfits the night before...I wish this worked for myself, but I never know what mood I'll be in
Again, I know that I am blessed and I don't want anyone to think that I am complaining about anything but I just wanted to share where I am at right now.  And if you are feeling a little unbalanced or overwhelmed, I hope this inspires you to make changes to help yourself as well.  And suggestions are always welcome!!

1 comment:

  1. Amber i love this. You are a talented writer, an exceptional mom and wife and a devoted woman of God. What a blessing you are to this world! I look so forward to reading your blog! I have subscribed so new posts should show up in my feed. Have a wonderful day!